Ritual of Calling Your Mom

Every 37 minutes and 42 seconds, a person must call their mother to report on their life choices.

It's a sacred tradition, passed down through generations of responsible_goals and adulting adults.

Failure to do so may result in:

• Limited access to family recipe database
• Disinheritance of family heirlooms
• Forced attendance at family reunions

Next in the Series: prophets-of-checking-your-private-server-for-new-email Rituals of Posting on Social Media prophets-of-selfies-and-unsolicited-advice Rituals of Texting Your Mom for help with basic household appliances

Step 1: Dial the number 1-800-MOM-HELLO

Step 2: Wait for 3-5 rings to ensure you're really calling your mom

Step 3: Say something like 'Hi, Mom' or 'Mom, it's me'

Step 4: Receive a 10-minuteประก lecture on the importance of calling more often

Step 5: Pretend to listen and agree to call more often, even if you have to lie about being on the phone with a client

Next in the Series: Rituals of Calling Your Dad