Justifications for Not Putting Socks in the Dryer

It's not like we're savages or anything.

Why bother with the dryer, really? It's just going to shrink them in half, making them useless for their intended purpose: silent communication.

• You can just talk to your socks, you know. They're not that hard to hear.
• It's not like they're going to get lost in the wash, but let's be real, they might.
• Who needs matching socks, really? It's just a social construct.
• It's a great opportunity to practice your sock- folding skills. You can be like a ninja.

But if you insist on using the dryer...

At least use the dryer-justifications subpage for that.

Or, if you're feeling adventurous, try socky-experiments for some real thrill.