Stocks for Beginners: A Guide to Making Your Enemies Rich

Step 1: Find an Enemy to Invest in

Identify a worthy adversary to make rich. Someone like your boss, a rival, or that one guy who always eats the last donut in the break room.

Choosing the Perfect Enemy Investing in the Future of Your Rivalry

Step 2: Learn the Basics

Don't be that person who shows up to a fight with a pocket full of cash. Educate yourself on stocks, bonds, and other fancy financial terms. You know, for the sake of your enemies' wealth.

Financial Terms for the Uninitiated Reading the Tea Leaves of Market Trends

Step 3: Execute the Plan

Buy, sell, and hold... on to your enemies' demise. Use your knowledge to make informed decisions and watch your rivals' fortunes dwindle.

Sabotage Through Stock Market Strategies Manipulating the Markets with Mind Games