Subscription Terms

Subscription Plan

Our subscription plan is simple: pay us money, get access to our mediocre content.

We offer two plans: "I'm a sucker", "I'm a bigger sucker", and "I'm a huge sucker".

Terms and Conditions

• By paying us, you agree to not be disappointed in our content.
• We're not responsible for your disappointment.
• If you're still not satisfied, please contact our customer support (just kidding, there is no customer support).
• Subscription fees are non-refundable, except for the first month, which is always a free trial.
• You must be at least 18 years old to subscribe (we're not kidding, it's the law).
• We reserve the right to change our subscription plans and fees at any time, without warning, without notice, and without explanation.By subscribing, you're agreeing to our Subscription Agreement and Terms of Use.

Don't like it? Don't subscribe.

Or, you know, Subscribe Now and get it over with.