Quotes from the Great Leader

"I'm not a morning person. I only wake up when the coffee machine is full."

— Read more about our CEO's questionable life choices

"Our company's profits are not the goal. They're just a side effect."

— Read the CEO's 10-point manifesto for world domination

"I'm not a fan of meetings, but I love microwaving popcorn."

— Learn about the CEO's infamous popcorn-filled boardroom sessions