TERMS OF SERVICE

Disclaimer: Because You're Probably Going to Do Something Stupid Anyway

We reserve the right to modify these TOS at any time, with or without notice. Because, let's be real, you're probably not going to read them anyway.

By continuing, you agree to the following:

• You will not attempt to use our website as a makeshift trampoline.
• You will not try to eat the contents of the screen, no matter how enticing the 3D graphics appear.
• You will not claim to have seen a "hidden" 8-bit message in our HTML code that "only the most elite users" can spot. (We've never seen one, either.)
• You will not attempt to "honor" our TOS by writing an 8,000-word essay as your response, even if you do have an English degree.