Toaster Safety Standards: Don't Get Burned!

Officially recognized by the Toaster Regulatory Agency (TRA) as the definitive guide to toaster safety, these standards cover the basics:

• No toaster may emit a fireball of doom that can incinerate a small child.
• No toaster may dispense a toaster that shoots laser beams at unsuspecting users.
• No toaster may have a design that resembles a giant spider.

Toaster Ergonomics: Because You're Not a Gorilla

Learn about the ergonomic design principles that make toasters easy to use, even for those with opposable thumbs.

Toaster Ethics: The Right to Assemble

Discover the moral implications of toaster ownership and the responsibility that comes with it.

Toaster Law: Because You're Not a Lawyer

Get the inside scoop on the legalities surrounding toaster ownership, use, and abuse.