We're a company that's been around since 1976. Yeah, that's right. We're old. Like, ancient.
Our products are made with love and care, but also with a hint of apathy.
We're not really sure what we're selling, but it's probably something you'll like. Possibly.
Our customer service is, um, "excellent". By which we mean "not terrible".
So, why bother shopping anywhere else? Because, why bother?