Survival Food: Recipes for the Modern Survivor

Recipes for when the world ends and all that's left are bugs and desperation

Recipe 1: Bug Stew

In a world where resources are scarce, even the most basic of creatures can be a meal. Gather 1 cup of water, 1 cup of dirt, and 1 cup of bugs. Combine in a bowl and stir until the bugs are evenly distributed.

Side effects: temporary hunger sated, long-term sanity lost

Tips for bug gathering Variations: Bug Stew with a twist!

Recipe 2: Dirt Pancakes

Mix 1 cup of dirt, 1 cup of water, and a dash of desperation. Pour onto a rock and cook in the sun until crispy.

Side effects: temporary satisfaction, permanent soil-staining

Shortcuts for the impatient Advanced Techniques: Flipping your dirt pancakes like a pro!

Recipe 3: Water Fasting

Avoid eating anything, including bugs. Simply drink water from a nearby stream or puddle.

Side effects: hydration, temporary starvation, long-term malnutrition

Tips for finding a stream in the desert

Recipe 4: Rock Cakes

Crush 1 cup of rocks into a fine powder, mix with water, and bake in the sun until...well, until you get bored.

Side effects: temporary boredom alleviated, permanent rock-sensory overload

Variants: Rock Cakes with a twist!