Departmental Bureaucracy Committee 1: Pivotal Decisions

Welcome, esteemed members of the committee. Today's agenda is to discuss the merits of implementing a new policy on "Pertinent Pencil Sharpening" in the office supply closet.

Note: Please keep your proposals concise and free of grammatical errors. The committee chair has threatened to call a 3-hour recess if anyone uses more than 3 commas in their submission.