Exceptions for the Exceptional

Are you one of the few who cannot read the previous article? Well, don't worry! We've got you covered.

It's not your fault, it was just a really long article. Like, really really long. We're talking Way longer than a Tuesday.

Here are some exceptions, just for you:

Exception 1: You have a rare genetic disorder that causes your eyes to involuntarily roll whenever you try to read.
Exception 2: You're secretly a time-traveler from the 1800s and our language is just too modern for you.
Exception 3: You're allergic to letters.

Don't worry, we won't judge you. Unless you're the third one. In that case, we can't help you.