Why, oh why, oh WHY can't I get a decent cup of coffee in this wretched world?

It's not like I'm asking for world peace or a cure for the common cold, just a simple cup of joe that won't give me a stomachache!

The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind:

The coffee shop down the street uses a 4-year-old French press that's more like a torture device than a brewing vessel.
More on the French Press of Despair;

The barista at the corner cafe thinks she's some kind of coffee artisan extraordinaire, when really she's just a coffee snob with a clogged espresso machine.

Takedown: Barista Edition

And don't even get me started on the hipsters at the new coffee place that's trying to sell me a $5 latte with a sprinkle of activated charcoal on top.

The Horror! The Humanity! The Overpriced Charcoal Latte!

The solution, my friend, is simple:

I'll just have to make my own coffee, with my own beans, in my own home, where the only thing I'll have to worry about is not burning the water.

The Hope of Homebrew