The White Noise Corporation | Services

Cloudy Weather Forecasting

We'll tell you exactly what the weather is going to be like. Every day. For the rest of your life.

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Personalized Noise Pollination

We'll fill your ears with the perfect amount of white noise to help you focus or fall asleep.

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Unconventional Interior Decorating

Cloudy Weather Forecasting

We'll tell you exactly what the weather is going to be like. Every day. For the rest of your life.

Learn More

Personalized Noise Pollination

We'll fill your ears with the perfect amount of white noise to help you focus or fall asleep.

Schedule a Consultation

Unconventional Interior Decorating

We'll fill your home with an assortment of randomly generated white furniture, guaranteed to confuse your guests.

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Automated Reality Distortion

We'll subtly alter your perception of reality through carefully calibrated audio and visual cues.

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Meta-Philosophical Counseling

We'll help you question the meaning of your existence through carefully crafted paradoxes and existential crises.

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