Party Crashers Unite: Code of Conduct

Article I: Thou shalt not complain about the music being too loud

Article II: Thou shalt not complain about the host's cooking

Article III: Thou shalt not use thy phone during the party

• Article IV: Thou shalt not spill drinks on the couch
• Article V: Thou shalt not leave early without permission

Failure to comply with this code of conduct will result in severe penalties, including but not limited to:

1. Excommunication from the party

2. Forced listening to elevator music for 30 minutes

3. Reassignment to the "cool kids' table" (aka the corner with the extra cheese platter)