John in Engineering: The Unyielding Unapologetic Genius

John is our engineering team's crown jewel. A man who can recite the entirety of the HTML5 spec from memory, while simultaneously explaining quantum mechanics to the coffee machine.

His code reviews are a series of love letters, each one ending with the phrase "You're welcome, human".

John in Design: The Visionary with a Venti John in Marketing: The Sultan of Sales Other Johns: The Uninvited Guests

This page brought to you by John in Engineering, and the fine folks at Our Inept Legal Team.