Alice's 1992 Manifesto

As a visionary leader in the year 1992, I, Alice, am here to tell you that the future is NOW. And that future is a future of:

• Neon-lit everything
• More mullets
• Less care about the environment

It's a future where the only thing that matters is the pursuit of POWER.

So, join me, and together we shall rule the world with an iron fist, or at least, a really loud, obnoxous, and flashy displayประก

Read on for the full manifesto:

Article 1: The Importance of Neon

Neon is the key to unlocking our true potential. Its bright, glowing light shall illuminate the path to success.

Read more about neon in:

Article 2: The Mullet: A Symbol of Power

The mullet is more than just a hairstyle, it's a statement. A statement of rebellion, of nonconformity, of pure, unadulterated power.

Read more about the mullet in:

Article 3: The Environment? Who Cares?

Let's be real, the environment is overrated. Who needs clean air, water, and land when you can have POWER?

Read more about why the environment is overrated in:

Or, if you're feeling particularly bold, you can view the draft manifesto, which is just as good as the final version, but with more spelling mistakes and awkward sentence structure.