Bob, Jr. is not a traditional philosopher, but rather a philosopher-king who has taken the time to ponder the intricacies of the universe while sipping on a fine scotch and wearing his favorite velvet pants.

His theories include:

• The Everything is a Pizza Theory (EIT): The universe is, in fact, a large, cheesy pizza.
• The Invisibility of Socks Theory (IST): Socks are, and always will be, invisible.
• The Theory of Unnecessary Capitalization (TUC): The more capitalization, the more profound.

Read Bob, Jr.'s Technopunk Manifesto for a deeper dive into his thought processes.

Read Bob, Jr.'s Letters to Self for a glimpse into his inner workings.