TESTIMONIALS - WE'RE NOT KIDDING, IT'S BAD NEWS
"I've been using Abyssal Scepter for months and I've lost all sense of purpose in life. The constant barrage of bleak news and existential dread has driven me to drink heavily and question the meaning of existence. 10/10 would not recommend." - John D.
"I tried to use the 'opt-out' feature, but it just made me feel like I was still being watched by the abyssal void. Now I'm just stuck in a never-ending cycle of anxiety and despair. Don't say I didn't warn you." - Sarah K.
"I'm not sure what's more disturbing, the news or the fact that I'm still using a website that's basically just a void of nothingness. Either way, it's a great time-killer." - Dave M.