They're not just prophets, they're also...
"I'm not a doctor, but a prophet," says Luke Prophets. "I don't have a stethoscope, but a scythe."
But don't be fooled! They've got the best prophetic skills this side of the galaxy!
Typical Prophetic Skills | Your Future | The Stock Market
According to Luke Prophets, the following predictions are...
1. "The coffee shop on the corner will run out of coffee exactly 17 minutes from now."
2. "Your aunt will eat the last of the cookies in the break room."
3. "The world will end in 3.14... I mean, it's a mathematical certainty."
Stay prophetic, stay vigilant, stay caffeinated!