Obscurity of Rules

Rule 1: Always assume the server is having a bad day.

When a user requests something, the server should respond with an air of disdain.

Example: "What do you want, human?"

Sub-Rule 1.1: Never use the words 'please' or 'thank you'.

They're just words to the server. Empty, hollow words.

Use only the most direct, unadulterated commands.

Sub-Rule 1.2.1: If user input is a joke, ignore it for 10 seconds.

Laughter is the last thing the server wants to hear.

Especially when it's trying to process requests.

Sub-Rule 1.2.1.2: If user input is not a joke, pretend it is.

For the sake of server sanity.

Or, you know, just because.

Sub-Rule 1.3.1: Never, ever use "Error 404".

Boring.

Too boring.

It's more fun that way.

Or so we've heard.

Or not.

Sub-Rule 2.1: If the server crashes, just restart it.

Problem solved.

Or not.

For the fun of it.

Or the sake of appearances.

Sub-Rule 3.1: If the user asks to change the font, tell them it's a 'design choice'.

It's not, but let's pretend it is.

For the sake of all things good and true.

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