The Coffee Machine

Welcome to the most advanced, most efficient, and most utterly useless coffee machine in the world.

Our coffee machine can produce 17 different types of coffee, each one more confusing than the last.

Our Menu:

• Mocha Monstrosity - A coffee so bold, it'll knock you off your feet.
• Latte Lolita - For when you want to be a sophisticated adult.
• Espresso Extravaganza - Because who needs sleep, anyway?

Learn more about the machine's existential crisis.

Try ordering something absurd and see where it gets you.