It's official. The apocalypse has come, and it's brought with it an unending drought of coffee.
Reports of coffee bean hoarding, price gouging, and barista burnouts have flooded in from the Midwest, where once-thriving coffee culture has been reduced to a mere memory.
But fear not, good people of the Midwest! For we have here, in this humble corner of the internet, a chronicle of the events that led to this dark and foreboding day.