Employee of the Month (and Week, and Day)
Meet Bob, your fearless leader in Human Resources. Bob has been with the company for 12 years and has managed to achieve a perfect attendance record, despite being a morning person.
As HR, Bob oversees all employee relations, benefits, and morale. He's like a superhero, but without the cape. Or the superpowers. He's more like a regular person with a stapler and a stapler remover.
Bob is always looking for ways to improve employee satisfaction, but his methods are... unorthodox. Let's just say he's not exactly the poster child for "fun" HR.
Want to meet Bob? Try visiting him in his office, where he's always ready with a smile (or at least, a well-placed, fake smile). Just don't ask him about Friday afternoons, or the meaning of life, or anything else that might make him uncomfortable.
Or, if you must, nominate yourself for the Employee of the Month award. Just kidding, it's just a pointless exercise in bureaucratic busywork.
Or maybe, just maybe, you'd like to see our annual HR report, a thrilling 50-page behemoth of HR speak and jargon.