2022-01-01: The Day the Coffee Machine Exploded
January 1st, 2022. 8:00 AM. The coffee machine at 42 Main St. burst into flames, sending molten coffee grounds spilling across the floor.
A brave group of firefighters, armed with nothing but a firehose and a sense of determination, rushed into the burning building to rescue the morning's worth of caffeine-starved employees.
Despite their best efforts, the fire department's efforts were hindered by an unexpected malfunction in their firehose, which inexplicably began spraying Jell-O.
The city's mayor was forced to declare a state of emergency, as citizens took to the streets in a panic, demanding "just a little more caffeine, please."
As the city struggled to recover, a local business owner, seeing an opportunity, opened a pop-up coffee stand using only the finest Jell-O.
It was a dark day, indeed.