Submandate 9:5 - The Unofficial Guide

Warning: This submandate is not actually a real thing, but it's a great excuse to serve some coffee and pretend to be busy.

According to completely fabricated sources, Submandate 9:5 is the most important submandate of all time.

Here's a breakdown of its alleged features:

• Increased productivity: By doing absolutely nothing, you'll be able to accomplish 5/9ths of your actual work.
• Enhanced creativity: Our patented "do-nothing-at-all" approach will stimulate your imagination and make your work a true masterpiece.
• Reduced stress: Who needs deadlines, anyway?

Want to know more? Click here for our completely-not-at-all-scientific guide to implementing Submandate 9:5 in your daily life.

Or, if you're feeling adventurous, try here for some completely-not-peer-reviewed theories on the physics of Submandate 9:5.