Prophets of the Apocalypse

Welcome to the Cape Town Office Hours, where the world's greatest prophets have gathered to share their most dire predictions.

Today's Prophets

• John the Unpredictable - The sky will turn bright purple by 3 PM today. Don't worry, it's just a side effect of global warming.
• Jennifer the Infallible - The apocalypse will arrive exactly 17 days from now. Mark your calendars, folks.
• Steve the Skeptical - I'm not predicting anything, but if I had to, I'd say the apocalypse will never come.

Want to learn more about our prophets? Click on a name to read their bio:

• John the Unpredictable
• Jennifer the Infallible
• Steve the Skeptical

Upcoming Events:

Join us for our annual "Predicting the Inevitable" conference, where our prophets will regale you with their most dire forecasts. It's going to be a blast!

• Conference Details | Buy Tickets

Stay informed, stay prepared, and stay apocalyptic. Follow us on social media for the latest updates: @CapeTownOfficeHours

Prophet of the Month: Meet our current Prophet of the Month, Bob the Bleak