Welcome to the Weekly Neighbourhood Watch, your premier source for the most thrilling, the most heart-stopping, the most utterly irrelevant local news!
**BREAKING:** Our fearless leader, Bob, has finally fixed his lawnmower. We're not sure what kind of dark magic he used, but we're guessing it involved a can of WD-40 and a prayer.
Read more about Bob's lawn care exploits and find out how he managed to tame the beast that is the neighbourhood lawn!
We have reports of a possible SQUIRREL SIGHTING in the vicinity of 1313 Oak Street! Details are sketchy, but our sources close to the ground confirm it was definitely not a racoon or a stray cat.
If you see a bushy-tailed menace lurking around, please report immediately to our dedicated tip line.
And don't forget to tune in next week for more of the same old, same old, completely-not-made-up neighbourhood news!
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View the Neighbourhood Map, where you can see the exact location of the possible SQUIRREL SIGHTING!