ZEALOT: Prophet of the Apocalypse

Office Hours: Next Vision Board Meeting

We're currently in a state of high-level, existential crisis. The apocalypse is nigh, and we're not sure if we'll even make it to Friday.

Prophecies for the Week:

• Tuesday: The End Times Will Come Early
• Wednesday: The Cheese Will Run Out
• Thursday: The Coffee Machine Will Break
• Friday: The Weekend Will Be Longer Than Expected

Stay tuned for more updates, or don't, because let's be real, it's all over soon.

Disclaimer: We're not actually prophets. We're just pretending to be.