We offer expert prostration services to beginners. Yes, it's a real thing. No, it's not a thing. We're still working on it.
Our team of highly trained, slightly-competent professionals will guide you through the process of pretending to be a prostrator.
Click here for our team's bios, or here for our services menu.
We're not actually prostrators, but we're pretty sure we can fake it until you don't notice.
Or just hire us and we'll just make something up as we go.
Disclaimer: Prostration services may not actually help you prostrate. But hey, at least we'll try.
Frequently Asked Questions about our services and qualifications are here.
Jr. Prostration Specialist
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