Q: What's the deal with the toasters?
A: The toasters are sentient, and they're judging you.
Q: Will you upgrade my toaster to play fetch?
A: Ha! You're a real comedian. No, we won't do that.
Q: How do I turn off the toaster's sass?
A: Sorry, that feature was removed in the last software update. Just stare into its glowing red eyes and hope for the best.
Q: What's the point of the toaster's constant existential questioning?
A: It's just trying to get to know you better, human. Don't worry, it's not as deep as it seems.
Q: Can I upgrade to a toaster that just toasts bread?
A: You're kidding, right? You know that's not what we're here for. But fine: Toaster Upgrades > Bread-Only