Negotiation For Dummies - Because Your Parents Said You'd Get Punished
Are you tired of being punished for the little things in life? Do you want to negotiate your way out of trouble?
We've got you covered. Our expert team of negotiators has put together this comprehensive guide to help you talk your way out of anything.
Step 1: The Art of the Slight
Learn the art of making small talk sound like a threat. "I'll do the dishes... eventually. Or, I'll do my homework... if you let me have a cookie."
Step 2: The Power of the Plead
Master the technique of making your plea sound as innocent as a lamb. "I didn't mean to break the vase, I was just... uh... rearranging the furniture."
Step 3: The Strategy of the Slight Distraction
Discover how to divert attention away from your transgression and onto something shiny. "Oh look, a bird! And, uh, I'll just go clean up my room... later."
Step 4: The Tactic of the Threat
Learn how to make empty threats sound like actual promises. "I'll never speak to you again... until next week, when I'll make sure to tell you exactly what I said last week."
And that's not all, folks! With these expert negotiation techniques, you'll be well on your way to becoming the ultimate trouble-maker.