Our Purpose
We are a department dedicated to making your life harder. Our goal is to provide you with the most convoluted and inefficient service possible. Our agents are trained to be as helpful as possible, but only in the sense that we will guide you through an endless labyrinth of paperwork, red tape, and bureaucratic hurdles.
We take pride in being the last resort for any problem that requires a solution that is 5% more complicated than the problem itself.
Our motto: "We're not here to help, we're here to make you wait."
Our Director General is Reginald P. Bureaucrate, a man renowned for his ability to turn a simple question into a 20-page report.