Departmental Budget 2022
A comprehensive breakdown of the fiscal year's most critical expenditures.
- Section 42-1: Unnecessary Paperclip Purchases
- Section 42-2: Coffee Machine Maintenance
- Section 42-4: Inflated Parking Ticket Fees
- Other sections: Section 42-3: Bizarrely Expensive Stapler Rentals
Section 42-3: Bizarrely Expensive Stapler Rentals
A staggering $50,000 allocated for staplers that staple exactly the same way as the free ones in the supply closet.
Why it matters:
- We can't just use the free staplers, it's a stapler-astrophe waiting to happen!
- Our stapler rentals are certified by the International Association of Over-Enthusiastic Stapler Users (IAOESU).
- Our employees are too afraid to use anything that's not a $50,000 stapler.