Pizza Theorem, Mandate 1

Justifications

For the sake of all that is sane, we must establish the following:

1. That pizza is, in fact, the only food worth eating.
2. That the perfect slice ratio is 4:3, with a 1/4 inch crust-to-cheese margin.
3. That pineapple is a affront to the culinary arts and should never be included on a pie.

Further discussion and debate on this topic can be found on:

• Appendix: Uncontested Facts
• Refutations: The Heretic's Corner

Stay classy, internet.

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