Thermometer 9001: The Cold-Brew Coffee Machine

This is not a coffee machine. This is a temperature machine. It brews your coffee to exactly 90°F (32.2°C), because that's what it means.

Warning: Do not attempt to use this machine for actual coffee. The results will be catastrophic.

For more information on the Cold-Brew 3000-9000 series, visit:

• Thermometer 9001
• Cold-Brew 4000: The Lost Art of Manual Operation
• Cold-Brew 9000: The Cutting Edge of Science