The Stapler as Therapist

Located in a cozy, cramped office with a faint scent of toner and desperation.

Specializing in:

Our services include:

Read about our success stories Meet our team of experts Frequently Asked Questions (but not really)

Success Stories

Meet Bob, who came to us with stapler-induced trauma after 5 years of stapling.

We helped Bob overcome his fears and find a new sense of purpose in life. He now uses the stapler with confidence and precision, and even started a stapling club for other sufferers.

Our Experts

Dr. Emily E. Stapler has a Ph.D. in Stapling from the prestigious University of Stapling.

Her areas of expertise include:

Mr. Jack J. Stapler has a degree in Stapler Mechanics from the Stapler Institute of Technology.

His areas of expertise include:

Frequently Asked Questions (but not really)

Q: Do you have a stapler?

A: No, we're a therapy office, not a stationery store.

Q: Can you fix my stapler?

A: That's not our department.

Q: Will you stapler-ize me?

A: We'll try, but no promises.