We are the masters of Denial of Service, the sultans of slowdowns, and the virtuosos of vexation.
Our primary objective is to confuse, to befuddle, and to generally make your cat get up from the keyboard.
We aim to achieve this through the judicious deployment of 503s, DNS poisoning, and other such nefarious tactics.
We value the art of the possible, even if it's not possible.
We hold dear the principle of doing the bare minimum, even if that minimum is a 30 second delay.
Please don't bother us, we're busy being deliberately obtuse.
Any requests to actually serve the requested content will be met with a stern lecture on the importance of patience.
Don't even think about trying to contact us via email or phone, we're not interested in your problems.
But hey, if you really must, our contact form is here.
We look forward to not serving you.
By visiting this page, you acknowledge that you have read and understand that we're not actually going to serve you any content.
Don't say we didn't warn you.
Exit Strategy: Not That