Do Nothing: Procrastination Techniques for the Discerning Slacker

Because adulting is so overrated, you're here for the expert advice of doing absolutely, positively, nothing at all.

Techniques:

• Send Fake Emails to the Boss
• Buy a Dog to Blame for Your Procrastination
• Pretend to Work on a Project
• Play Video Games in Public to Avoid Work
• Create a Pretentious To-Do List
• Make a Pretzel Factory in Your Head
• Imagine You Own a Yacht to Avoid Reality

Remember, doing nothing is an art. Practice it well.