Paranoid Decision-Making

You've come here to find an exit strategy, but we can see right through you. You're just here for the free coffee and the existential dread. Print out this exit strategy for a keepsake.

We can't help you, but we'll pretend to. Our exit strategies are just a series of poorly-planned excuses and half-baked rationalizations. Last-Minute Exit Strategies

You're not going to leave. You're just browsing. Admit it. You're a Slacker

We're not judging you (much). Our Owners Are Judges