Subpage 3: The Stapler
Subpage 4: The Incriminating Evidence
Behold, the shocking footage of John's stapler misuse!
John Doe, CEO of "I'm a Big Shot" Corporation, was accused of misusing the office stapler. Witnesses claim that John used the stapler as a makeshift paperweight, a pen holder, and even as a makeshift phone.
Defense team claims that John was simply "reorganizing his workspace." The prosecution, on the other hand, says that's just what they all say.
I'm a big shot. I have a big job. I need a big stapler.
My stapler is not just any stapler. It's a stapler of discerning taste. It's a stapler with a certain... je ne sais quoi.
I'm not misusing it, I'm just reorganizing. Reorganizing my desk, reorganizing my life.
View my expert witness testimonyBehold, the shocking footage of John's stapler misuse!
Dr. Emily Evermore, expert witness and renowned stapler specialist, takes the stand!
"I've seen it all, folks. I've seen staplers used as paperweights, as pen holders, and even as makeshift phones. But this... this is different. This is a crime against humanity."
Watch as Dr. Evermore's testimony is interrupted by John's defense team's antics.
View the dramatic courtroom exchangeJohn's defense team tries to spin the truth, but Dr. Evermore won't be silenced!
Watch as the courtroom erupts in chaos!
View the thrilling conclusionThe verdict is in! John Doe is found... GUILTY!
The people rejoice as justice is served!
View the epilogueJohn Doe is sentenced to a year's probation and 100 hours of community service... stapling.
He is also forced to wear a "I'm a Stapler Abuser" t-shirt every Friday.
The office will never be the same again!
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